Our Wedding Part II: The Big Day

I opened the curtain in my hotel room the morning of our wedding, and all I saw were sheets of rain and gusts of wind so strong small children needed to be anchored by their parents. “This looks like a perfect day for an outdoor wedding!” I turned to my best friend, and shrugged. “Here we go!”

We bustled around all day, preparing the last minute details, including picking up the pretzel trays from Philly Pretzel Factory and the keg of Coors Light(because we were trying to class it up from our usual Keystone Light). Again, we are super fancy – see Our Wedding Part I.

I slapped on my makeup minutes before our incredibly fabulous photographer walked in the hotel room. (Side note: Our photographer was so good, you can’t even see our goosebumps or blue lips in the pictures!) My bridesmaids put on their strapless, knee length dresses, and in retrospect, they should have been parkas. Once we were all dressed and ready, we dashed to our designated vehicles, shielding ourselves from the icy cold rain of death.

📷: Amanda Naylor Photography

As we pulled up to the farm, the first thing I saw were the huge tent flaps being blown around like they were tissues by massive gusts. I took a deep breath and quickly prayed that everything within was staying put.

By some amazing stroke of luck, the rain stopped for us to take some lady pictures and then we were able to wait inside Jacob’s Gram’s house for the guests to arrive in… wait for it… a school bus. Only the best accommodations for our guests.

The ceremony ended up being perfect. Short, sweet, baseball analogies by our pastor, Jacob’s mom and her siblings played their string instruments, and it was lovely! I walked down the isle to an acoustic guitar playing, “Can’t Help Falling in Love.”

After Jacob and I walked out of the tent, just married, we breathed a sigh of relief and embraced. We were married and so in love! And now it was time to celebrate!

📷: Amanda Naylor Photography

While we were off having our pictures taken, our guests were doing whatever they could to keep warm. What we didn’t know was that Jacob’s brothers ran out to the liquor store between the ceremony and reception to get more alcohol. Along with this, Jacob and I hired some inexperienced bartenders to make our boxed wine and keg look fancy. And to top it all off, one of our guests made two bottles of wine for each table including custom labels! It was amazing wine and my drink of the night.

📷: Amanda Naylor Photography

So, let’s recap. Inexperienced bartenders + handles of college level boos + homemade wine = some really, really, extra strong drinks and some really, really, extra sloppy people.

When Jacob and I were announced into the reception, we noticed a few things. 1. The pretzel trays were gone 2. Wow! Everyone is super excited to see us and 3. Is that one of Jacob’s groomsmen giving my dad a lap dance?

As the night progressed, the liquor continued to flow and the dance floor continued to accumulate mud. We honestly should have had everyone sign accident waivers because of how many guests fell. Everyone was drinking so much the the line to the port-a-potty started to get lengthy… just kidding. Everyone just peed outside. 🙋🏼‍♀️

At one point a tent pole fell on our cake, and our dear bus driver/family friend rotated the cake so no one could tell. Not all heroes wear capes. And that’s also not the only mess she had to clean up. There was an unfortunate groomsman bus vomit incident.

📷: Amanda Naylor Photography

When the bus came to pick everyone up to take us back to the hotel, it was evident that fun was had by all. Maybe too much fun. My dress had six inches of mud caked to the bottom of it, and I swear to God, when I took it off that night, a spider crawled out of the layers. I’m pretty sure we will never be allowed to rent anything from Men’s Warehouse again, either.

At the end of the day, the mission was accomplished and Jacob and I were husband and wife. Our crazy wedding of unforeseen events has just carried over into our regular life, and we are pretty great at just taking whatever is thrown at us. I couldn’t love Jacob any more, he is so perfectly imperfect. Just like our big day.

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