Do you remember the last time you went on a date with your significant other? Yeah, me either. But I’m pretty sure when we do take time for some special one-on-one time, my date prep routine is always the same. And it goes a little something like this. Hit it!
First I have to take care of some hairy details, like my momstache and my unibrow. Nair for your face is the quickest and least painful method. Unless, of course, your three year old has an elaborate snack plan and you leave it on for too long and develop a chemical burn. Then it hurts like for real, for real.
Now it’s time to hop in the shower. After evaluating the time frame, I am able to determine what portions of my leg I can shave. If I have a full 10 minutes, I can knock out the entire leg, no problem! But I only have 6, so just to the knee it is. I can’t remember the last time I shaved above the knee… No, scratch that. I actually can’t remember the last time I shaved my legs at all.
The next step is the worst ever. Finding something to wear. I look over at my jeans and then laugh out loud, as I pull out black leggings from my closet. Now I sift through my tops like I’m searching for the answer to life. Instead I settle for the answer to “what will hide my post-baby bod?” Loose and flowy with a side of tall boots.
Makeup time. And I must admit, I love doing my own makeup. I’m not a trained professional, but I like to keep abreast of the current trends, learned by the budding makeup artists of YouTube Kids. Ok, they’re children. I’m learning makeup tips from children.
And I understand that this is archaic, but I don’t own a hair dryer. So I have two options. Run a brush through my hair and just go with it, or pull it back into a low messy bun. I generally start with option one and then transition to option two some time during the date.
Now that I’m ready and looking mildly presentable, I meet my husband in the kitchen. He always makes a really big deal about how great I look and how he’s so lucky. Outwardly, I tell him to stop and he’s just saying that, but it always makes me feel really good. Even with my elementary level makeup, wet hair, and fuzzy thighs.